Rules according to Moki

Moki is hilarious and I've thought about writing a book based on his perception of the world. Here is an ongoing list of Rules According to Moki.

1. Cat Food:

The bowl itself is off limits to me. However any kibble on the ground is fair game.

2. The Couch:

If humans are present I will always ask permission to jump up on the couch. If no humans are present or you do not acknowledge me, I will assume it is ok and will make the executive decision.

3. Dinner plate:

If food is at eye level while you are watching a movie, I will wait until the food is offered before eating. Unless you ignore me or take too long to eat. At which time as commander in thief I will authorize the use of force.

4. Long sleeved shirts:

Any extremities dressed in long sleeves do not perceive pain. If your arm is covered by a sleeve consider it a squeeze toy (we love to wrestle with him. But if we wear long sleeves he will totally chomp into your arm thinking it can't really feel anything because it's covered in sleeves)

5. The Bed:

If the bed sheets aren't clean and smell than I can bring my bone up and eat it there too.

6. The Bed again:

If you get up to pee between the hours of 5:30-6:30am consider it a game of you don't snooze you loose. The bed is mine now punk. I'm spooning with mom!

7. Pillows:

I will not put my head on your pillow. But I will put my butt on your pillow.

8. The bicycles:

You touch the bike in the garage, I'm going too. Whether you touched the bike for a ride or just to tidy up the garage, I'm still going.

9. Dishwasher:

When dinner is done, it is to be assumed that I get to do the dishes. Just because company is present does not mean this practice is barbaric.

10. Dishwasher again:

If the dishwasher is left open, it is my job to give it a quick second pre rinse.

11. The kitty is only a part of the family when I want her to be.

12. Frisbee:

Just because you are not done working does not mean that it is not a perfect time for a game of frisbee. If you ignore me and my frisbee, you can be sure that the last lesson of the day initiates a one on one game of a night frisbee. I even brought you my glow in the dark frisbee.

13. Recycling (which we keep piled on the floor by our garbage just waiting to be brought out)

Just because your pile is destined for recycling doesn't mean it shouldn't get an extra tongue cleaning. Remember: Rinse, recycle, repeat.

That pretty much sums Moki and his thoughts and assumptions up in a nutshell. This list will probably be ongoing...